While our adult lives are full of their own stress and responsibilities, childhood isn’t exactly a walk in the park. Children are learning new information all the time, being tested on it, changing schools and neighborhoods, going through changes, encountering bullies, making friends and facing disappointment from them.

Although we like to think they have it easy, they also face their own problems. What helps them navigate these kinds of challenges is resilience.

Below are some valuable suggestions for raising resilient kids:

• Not accommodating every need – Overprotecting and over-helping reduces their problem-solving skills and always provides comfort, which does not allow them to experience small hardships and overcome them. 
  

• Teach, not do – Instead of doing everything for them, show them how to do it. This will help them to develop skills and avoid running to mommy for everything. 

• Stop asking “why?” – “Why did you leave your bike out in the rain?” Stop asking questions like these, because they won’t solve anything. Instead, ask “how” questions, for example: “Your bike chain rusted in the rain because you left it out. How are you going to fix that?” This will get them thinking of ways to fix the situation, and if they develop this type of mindset early on in life, it will make them better problem-solvers in the future. 

• Don’t give them all the answers – If they come to you with a question like “Is it going to rain tomorrow?”, instead of saying “Yes, it will” you could say “I don’t know, perhaps. What will you do if it does?” This type of answer helps kids to learn to tolerate uncertainty and think about ways to deal with potential challenges.

Building resilience is done over time. You just have to take off the training wheels every now and again and allow them to make mistakes, deal with hardships and problem-solve. The younger they learn these skills, the more resilient they’ll be as a future adult.

You Don’t Have To Do It Alone.

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